Sunshine, and Rain

It was an odd day.  I woke to an email announcing the separation of a friend's marriage.  Stunned and saddened, I continued to scan my emails and face book pages, all full of news, reflection and calls to action in Haiti. 

At some point in the day, the news broke across the ELCA community that a seminarian was killed in the earthquake.  Friend after friend posted a call for prayers for his family.  It happens that he is the son of two pastors, his mother a former bishop.  It isn't that this makes it more sad, or this death more important than the 100,000 (gasp) of other people mourning or searching, but it does mean I can see the faces of those wracked in pain tonight.  I know who is suffering in grief and those sitting stunned by how this tragedy has come to sit in their living room.

What makes this day more odd is that I am happy.  The months of thyroid induced malaise has passed.  Our little family, quirks and all, is about as good as it has been in years.  We sit in our house (ok, it is still the same house...but that is another post) all cuddled up reading books and chatting around the table.  We smile and snuggle and kiss and talk.  I even have a date tomorrow night.  As I type I am listing to my husband and BB chat and laugh in the quiet rhythm that is uniquely theirs.

Like any good addict I know that as I type, I am missing two tv shows, but I choose to leave them off for now.  The books on my nightstand and my pajamas are calling me.  Baby steps.

I did all I could do today.  I wrote an email back to my friend expressing my sorrow and support.  I said prayers for the thousands of mothers and fathers whose arms are empty tonight.  I sent money to the Lutheran World Relief.  I offered countless prayers with my friends.  And, I gave thanks.

It was a day buoyed by unbelievable joy at new life, and simultaneously covered in sorrow at the vulnerability of humanity.

We await tomorrow, fully of grace and with strength enough to do what we can.