I'd Say it Was a Carnival.

Raffle baskets are a difficult concept for a 4 (3/4) year old.  All he saw was a HUGE basket with Legos piled high inside.  He walked by it, stopped to smell it, touched it a bit, wiped his drool off of the table it was set up on and dove into the carnival games.

We went to the kids' school Fall Fest Carnival last night.  In case you missed that in my warm up.

I was feeling generous in my "support the school" spirit and purchased way too may tickets for any 4 and 2 year old to work through (especially at 6pm).  We fished for plastic fish.  We weighed our odds and grabbed ducks out a pond.  We threw rope circles on to the horns of a plastic bull.  We sent disks down a pegged board, trying to get 5 prize tickets.  We picked our suckers from the Lollipop Tree in hopes of finding one with the right color on the bottom.  Many, if not most of the games had an element of 'chance' to them.  BB and Michael ignored this...just enjoying the process of handing over a ticket and then never really understanding that they could have gotten more prize tickets, had they Lady Luck gone their way.

At least I thought that was what was going on.  Once we had done all the games, BB announced it was time to head over to collect his prize.  He headed in the exact opposite direction of the actual prize table.  "BB, it is over here."  Then I saw where he was headed with his 30 prize tickets.  The Lego Raffle Basket.
"BB, those are a special, different part of the night.  The adults bought tickets and put them in each basket for....a chance at winning.  They may not call our names." (and your mother never wins anything...so don't hang with me, kid.)

This did not go over well.  While I think he got the message that we may not win, he never fully absorbed the game rules.  I think it had a hard time making it through the layers of his imagination that had him taking home that box of Lego sets.

We got him over the the prize table.  To make matters worse the only way he could get what he wanted was to pool resources with little 'Miss I've Been Pouting and Crying and Making Daddy's Life Miserable for that Last 15 Mins While Mommy Talks to People.'  She didn't honestly get any of the economics of the night, so she never knew she gave My Husband permission to hand over her prize tickets to BB.  50 tickets got them a cowboy hat.  to. share.

Then the raffle started and BB and his his best bud caught wind of this.  The two of them got front row seats.  My Husband was done with the night and took Michael to the car.  I waited with friends and BB until the Lego Basket came up.

You know this story doesn't have a happy ending.

Perhaps, the worst part of the whole thing was the face and attitude of the boy who won.  I imagine that he didn't realize what the heck was going on any more than my kids did, so I give him that.  But seriously, kid, you just won THE LEGO BASKET.  THE LEGO BASKET.  He calmly stood to accept his prize.  His face registered no joy, no interest, no enthusiasm...at. all.  He calmly took it, nearly falling at the weight of the box, and sat down.  Where was the passion?  Come, on!!!  If you would have looked across the room, you would have seen what passion looks like--Sad, hot tears on the face of a little boy clinging to his mom's legs.  It wasn't pretty.  It got loud.

We had a great night.  No, seriously.  It didn't end well.  It ended loud and angry.  People had very hurt feelings.  We feel things around here.  We feel them deeply. We feel them for a long, long time...well into bed time.  Well after Mom and Dad have shut the doors and turned off the lights...the passion continues.

This morning, everyone woke up happy.  No one is mentioning the night before.

It was a carnival.


p.s.  I nearly forgot...our house is still for sale.

Frightening

A really nice byproduct of having a blog is the ready made filing cabinet for my memories.  Today, I looked back at what I did last Oct.  Apparently, I was on speed.  On Oct. 29, 2009, I was making birthday invitations for a party six weeks away.  Hum.  I do have the cookies on my mind for Oct. 29, 2010.  But the party planning is nowhere on my agenda.  (although BB does talk about his 'theme' and gift list daily hourly.)

I have no idea where we will be for his birthday.  And, I have not yet committed to a 'friend' party.  I'm in denial that I will have a five year old.

And, ya, know....our house is still for sale.

CaNdY!!!!!

First.  Our house is still for sale.

Apparently, Halloween is becoming a holiday we celebrate for weeks on end.  The kids have already been to two "Fall Festivals."  Both of which involved CaNdY.  Bags of CaNdY.

We've had some interesting "quiet times."  Instead of doling out CaNdY slowly, or hiding it, (and eating it myself) or buying it back, I am letting the kiddos eat it all.  At one sitting. 

Or, rather at their own pace.  As it turns out they actually pace themselves.  To their mother who has never really understood delayed gratification and has a mild addiction to food sugar, their behavior is odd.

But because of this addiction, and some emphasis on, ya know, nutrition, we never rarely have candy in the house. I figure once a season they might as well go crazy.  It is an odd move in today's parenting world.  I'm not sure if it is a conscience decision on my part or lazy parenting...either way, we are enjoying this week(s) of CaNdY!

8:00am to 2:00pm with 3,4,5 yr olds

If you know me, the title alone should get you in your car to bring me a glass of wine.  It has been a long day.  I volunteered for it.  The first half of the day, that is.  Then the field trip got moved to the afternoon.  And, three hours turned into five.
The greatest lesson I learned was that my nearly five year old is a) normal and b) is doing just fine.  While still unable to sit still and a bit bossy, he exhibits many other good qualities that I am, in fact, happy about.

And, p.s. our house is still for sale.

I live up to my name...

Yes, I'm sure you were looking for an actual post.  One with words and updates.  Perhaps, just a thoughtful reflection on an event.
Sorry.
I redecorated, instead.
The blue is too much like my high school color.  But it matches the blue on the ladder better than any purple I could find create. Rest assured I will play with it a bit more.
Our house is still for sale, so I am redecorating my blog to release my creative energy.

I Don't Do That

I have a review for work this afternoon.  Last night as I was filling out the form, I realized that I don't actually have a job description.  This past year I have done bits and pieces of what was asked and what I felt like doing.  While I will try to clarify my role today in the review, it doesn't completely bother me.

As I was thinking this over I read a chapter in the book Bittersweet by Shauna Niequist.  She talked about how she needed to define her own job description.  Especially, when it came to motherhood.  She wrote about how helpful it was to write out not only a list of what you do like to do, and have to accomplish, but also a list of what you don't do.

I'm pondering this thought.

I realized I don't make Halloween costumes.  That one is coming off my list of "things I feel I should do."
While it might seem that my creative energies would be all about the costume creation.  Halloween always sneaks up on me and I feel pressure rather than enjoyment.  Apparently, there are other things I'd rather be doing during the month of October.

Job descriptions are reviewed on a yearly basis so we'll see what next year brings.  But right now, I am giving my self permission to buy a costume, should it come to that.

It would also be mighty helpful if the costume wearers liked to a) wear costumes and b) could make up his mind.

Reunion

Whether my parents intended it or not, my most influential and important extended family, isn't family at all.  We don't share any common genetics, or last names, or great grandparents.

What the first generation shares is common professors, and meals in a shared dining hall and stories from college housing...fraught with mild mischief.  Nine people...some of whom married each other, some never married, some married from "the outside"...went on to form this group.  Over the past 40 plus years, they gathered for parties and  long weekends where they camped at each others houses.  They shared casual get togethers and wove their lives together as tightly as any DNA could have.

Only one person beyond the first generation holds a degree from the college campus that started it all.  The second generation has been dragged brought  back for more than one homecoming and we could tell the folklore of the campus art and even share stories from a magical Pink House.  We are busy bringing up and bringing in the third generation of this family.

This weekend is my 15 year reunion for my college class.  My husband and I met there our junior year.  He lived for two years in an honor house with many men.  I lived with roommates I no longer keep in touch with and then by myself...in blissful heaven for a year.  I spent my college days in the, now seemingly ridiculous, pursuit of athletic dreams.  My teammates and I had lost contact with each other by 1996.

Due to my the influence and mythic importance I put on my parent's friends, I have always had vulnerable spot when it comes to the topic of college friends and my lack there of.

The men from my husband's college house all (nearly all) married women from our college.  The women get together every year.  I don't know if the men do, but they will all be together at the reunion this weekend.  Through the magic of Facebook, I am 'friends' with these women.  Their get togethers make me a little sad...jealous perhaps.  Frustrated that I didn't know what I would be missing out on when I passed on their offers of friendship 15 years prior.

In the end we aren't going to the reunion due to our schedule.  The trip to my home state can only be done so many times in one month and the reunion got cut.  I would have loved to be there.  A decade and a half has healed many insecurities and settled me in my own skin.  I was looking forward to seeing familiar faces again and catching up in person.  I was interested in meeting people I should have met 15 years ago.

Then it hit me as to how it is slightly odd that so much emphasis is placed on these four years of our life.  I decided to cut myself a little slack.  Since 1995, I have been a part of numerous groups with whom I would love to catch up.  I wondered what makes our college years so poignant and holy?  It isn't 'ba hum bug' or even insecurity that asks the question...I just wonder.

I will never have what my parents have with their college friends.  What I have is a person here and a dear one there.  My friends and soul mates are spread out across the country.  Stories and moments scattered and sent.  Memories from Habitat training classes and my work colleagues at my first 'real' job fill me with joy and energy.  I cherish my seminary classmates and perhaps that is where my reunion energy will land.

All of this wistful looking backwards has taught me that friendships take time, cultivation....they don't just happen. When they do, one should take great care with them and be very grateful to be apart of it.  Even if you are in the second generation.

This is a lesson I learned in college.

Um. Yah. Yah.  Be sure to listen to the song as well.